Handling It

Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:2 NIV)

I've recently "liked" a FaceBook page called "The God Article." They post a lot of very thought-provoking things and a lot of great discussion follows in the comments. Lately they have been posting common platitudes many well-meaning Christians use to "comfort" those in crisis. None are biblical, and all are bad theology. I may talk about many of them in coming blogs, but today, I want to talk about my least favorite non-biblical, bad theology platitude: "God doesn't give us more than we can handle."

Have you ever been told that? Was your first reaction, "Well, I sure wish God didn't have such a high opinion of me!" Here are some reasons NOT to use this phrase:

1. Many people have gotten more than they can handle. People commit suicide because they can't handle what they "got." People have nervous breakdowns because they can't handle what they "got." People die everyday... sounds like they couldn't "handle" whatever it was that made them die.

2. This platitude supposes that God does terrible things to us just so we can "handle" it. Does God kill our children, or throw us into poverty or make our spouses leave us? I don't think so.

3. It also hints that we are on our own as we try to "handle" life. I think this saying would work better if it said, "There is nothing that can happen to us that we can't get through with the help of God and our friends and family"... if we ask for and allow them to help.

I was not always a Christian in the truest sense of the word. Back then there was a loneliness that I carried with me whether or not I was with people. I could not have handled a huge tragedy back then... by myself. Since embracing my faith, I have lost that loneliness. Even when I am alone I am not really alone and I always sense that God is with me and never really feel lonely anymore. I know that if something terrible happens, I don't have to handle it by myself. God will grieve with me and strengthen me and help me to cope. And my family, friends and Christian community will be there as "Jesus with skin."

It's hard to know what to say to someone going through a really bad time. But instead of platitudes that tend to be hurtful and bewildering, try just being there to listen.

Father,
Be with each person today who is going through something they just can't handle on their own. Open their hearts to hear your offer of help. Open their mouths to ask for help from their friends, family and community. If we are their community, open our eyes to their needs and our ears to their cry. Amen.

Joys: plans to go hiking... I've been away from it for a few weeks; doing a birthday party with friends at a nursing home tonight; having a sleep-over with Cecelia tonight