Relationships

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:38-42 NIV)

Bring up the story of Mary and Martha in any group of Christian women and you've got trouble!  Each will comment on whether they think they themselves are a Mary or a Martha and then offer opinions on the degree of Mary/Martha in everyone else they know.

The thing is, the way we usually read that story, it seems as though the hard-working, make-your-guests-comfortable-and-welcome hostess type is bad, and the sit-on-your-butt-and-act-like-a-guest-yourself hostess is bad.

I've read many Bible studies and commentaries that tell us not to be so hard on the "Marthas" in our churches... we need them!  And as an active church member and church employee, I know how important they are.  But I really don't think this story is about church.  This story is about priorities.

Life is about relationships.  Everything else in life... our jobs, our homes, our hobbies, our volunteer acitivities,  our laws... is about supporting relationships.  When supporting our relationships interferes with our actual relationships, then we have our priorities messed up.  Look at the Good Samaritan story.  The priest and the Levite neglected their neighbor relationship for  reasons that are supposed to support relationships:  worship and law.  Their priorities were messed up.

Like everything else in life, it's not black and white.  Tending to one relationship sometimes interferes with another relationship and sometimes activities that support relationships just have to be done even though it temporarily affects a relationship.  But the questions we should ask ourselves are:  Can this supporting activity be done at another time?  Is the extent of the support I'm building really necessary, or should I be satisfied with less while I spend more time in relationships?  Can the support activity be done at the same time as I nurture relationships?

I love the last question... maybe Jesus, Mary and Martha could have all prepared a meal together?  The important thing to remember is that when we are on our death bed, all those things that supported our relationships will mean nothing.  It will be the relationships themselves that we cling to.

Father,
Help us to always put our relationships with you and with one another at the top of our priorities.  Amen