The the man [whom Jacob wrestled] said, "You shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God and with humans, and have prevailed. -Genesis 32:28
Who hasn't struggled with God? It's easy to simply worship, adore and commune with God when all is well. And even when life's bumps and upsets come along, we do our best to "praise him in the storm," and often succeed. But then there are the really bad things that we just don't, don't, don't understand. I don't even have to name any of them. You have them in your own life and you've seen them in the lives of others. That's when we struggle to even believe that there can be a god. A god who allows horrible things to happen to people. A god who turns his back to our most fervent prayers. A god who - perhaps - isn't really there at all.
In the story of Jacob's travel to return to his home, we feel his gut-wrenching fear of meeting up with Esau. Jacob makes elaborate plans to save at least a portion of his family and wealth and he is willing to give nearly all of it to Esau if he would just spare their lives. He goes to bed, but there is no sleep. His mind is filled with "what if" and "how can I" and "what will tomorrow bring". And he wonders if God cares that he is this afraid. And Jacob wrestles all night until he finally feels God's real and absolute presence.
Never be afraid to wrestle with God. Ask the deep down hard questions. Yell at him. Cry out your greatest pains and fears. When we get into the real nitty-gritty with God and wrestle right up until we wonder if He is even there, that is when you will know his presence the most deeply.
God Over Our Fears,
Thank you for being a God who doesn't mind our questions and anger and grief-ridden denial of you. Thank you for being steadfastly there when we need you the most even if we do not feel you. Amen.
Who hasn't struggled with God? It's easy to simply worship, adore and commune with God when all is well. And even when life's bumps and upsets come along, we do our best to "praise him in the storm," and often succeed. But then there are the really bad things that we just don't, don't, don't understand. I don't even have to name any of them. You have them in your own life and you've seen them in the lives of others. That's when we struggle to even believe that there can be a god. A god who allows horrible things to happen to people. A god who turns his back to our most fervent prayers. A god who - perhaps - isn't really there at all.
In the story of Jacob's travel to return to his home, we feel his gut-wrenching fear of meeting up with Esau. Jacob makes elaborate plans to save at least a portion of his family and wealth and he is willing to give nearly all of it to Esau if he would just spare their lives. He goes to bed, but there is no sleep. His mind is filled with "what if" and "how can I" and "what will tomorrow bring". And he wonders if God cares that he is this afraid. And Jacob wrestles all night until he finally feels God's real and absolute presence.
Never be afraid to wrestle with God. Ask the deep down hard questions. Yell at him. Cry out your greatest pains and fears. When we get into the real nitty-gritty with God and wrestle right up until we wonder if He is even there, that is when you will know his presence the most deeply.
God Over Our Fears,
Thank you for being a God who doesn't mind our questions and anger and grief-ridden denial of you. Thank you for being steadfastly there when we need you the most even if we do not feel you. Amen.
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